What is there left for me?!

I think it's time i face the truth.

I think it's time that people learn the truth. It may be hard to take it. You may think it's a joke. But somehow these past few weeks have made me realise that it's time to look at my life from a different angle.

As my undergraduate days are coming to an end, I have started thinking on what life would be like after that. Insyaallah I may get to do my honours. But if not, it's about time to start thinking about my future ahead. The question of staying in Australia or going back to Singapore has always been an easy decision. To stay in Australia of course, Melbourne to be more specific.

But then, after career planning my future, what with getting my Temporary Residency then my Permanent Residency, I somehow linger to think about my love life. What love life? EXACTLY!~ What love life? The past few years, i have not come across anyone who would say be "suitable" for me nor have I been interested in anyone long enough to question if the feeling is real or not. My flatmates and I have gone through phases of "Wanting a Boyfriend" for the past 2 years. And now, the most dreadful time has come.

Something that I have thought I would not ever try and consider. A normal girl's life would have been filled with images of her being a bride, planning her wedding day and most importantly, marry the man of her dreams OR her soulmate. But now, realising that there is no more decent guys (who are still single) out there, i think it's time for me to wake up & snap back to reality.

I will not be able to find MY guy. I will not be able to meet THE ONE. And I don't think I want to continue looking or waiting. I'm gonna be like one of my aunt's colleague, SINGLE yet surrounded by friends and family who love her. It's a good thing, I reckon. Some people are meant to be wives, to be mothers and to be caregivers of small little human, who grow up to either love you or hate you. Maybe i can consider IVF (like in 10 years time when Im richer?) but I'm not so sure what the rules are in Islam (Ct to enlighten me?!).

For me, I hope that God will guide me to a brighter and happier future. I can only pray that I get to be who I want to be, only if God allows me to do so.